Teen paints 60ft penis on roof of parents' house for Google Earth's cameras

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When you’re designing a million pound house, there are all kinds of things you need to check. Double glazing? Check. Burglar alarm? Check. 60 ft phallus painted on the roof? Ch… wait, what?

And that expression of surprise was probably comparable to the reaction of Andy McInnes when reporters from The Sun asked him if he was aware of the giant penis daubed in white paint across his rooftop. Unsurprisingly he wasn’t (it’s not the kind of question you answer with “why yes, of course” is it?). Turns out the stunt was his son’s dong doing – having seen a TV programme on Google Earth, he wanted to see if the giant phallus would be picked up by Google’s cameras. The answer? No, the website still shows the original pristine rooftop at the time of writing, despite the artwork being up there for over a year now.

The 19th Century got Impressionism, we get Suck UK graffiti trains at Firebox

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And politicians wonder why this country is going to the dogs! When companies like Suck UK and Firebox are flogging trains you can graffiti yourself, there’s little wonder kids do this to trains nowadays. I just realised how much I’m beginning to sound like Jack Thompson, argh.

Still, even if they are possibly encouraging kids to vandalise public transport, these graffiti trains from Firebox do look like fun, and will allow you to live out the life of Banksy in your very own house. Each train is like a blank canvas…