Samsung promise "Fastest Colour Laser Printer"

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We don’t often do printers round these parts any more, being total converts to the paperless office. In fact, it’s been ages since I physically wrote something on paper. Occasionally, though, you do have to print something out, so you’ll need a printer.

When you do, you don’t want to be hanging around, so I thought I’d share the news that Samsung has invented its fastest ever colour printer – the CLP-770ND. This baby can pump out 32 pages per minute, with the first one showing up just 11 seconds after you hit the ‘print’ button.

You’re unlikely to want this thing in your house – it’s aimed more at the corporate world – but it packs an 80GB hard drive and 720MHz processor, if high specs are what you want from a printer. It comes with 256MB of memory onboard, expandable to 1GB if you want things even faster.

The CLP-770ND will be out in June, and cost an unannounced amount. Expect the toner cartridges to cost you a vast amount more.

Asus launches quad-core gaming laptop – claims 'fastest in the UK'

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Asus has just announced the UK’s first quad-core gaming laptop, claiming it’s the fastest gaming laptop that money can buy. It’s got an Intel Core 2 Extreme QX9300 processor running at 2.53GHz, 4GB of RAM, a Geforce 9700M graphics card, and a pair of 250GB hard drives in RAID-0.

The beast packs a 17″ screen, with 1920×1200 resolution, and a smaller ‘VFD’ display too, which can show email notifications and framerates while in-game. It’s got a 2 megapixel webcam, 802.11n wireless, HDMI and eSATA ports, 2.1 speakers and a subwoofer, and ‘programmable chassis lighting’…

Meet HECToR – the UK's fastest computer

hector-super-computer.jpgHECToR is that room full of 60 cabinets to the left there. The cabinets are all linked up. Together they make one of Europe’s fastest supercomputers.

HECToR apparently has the power of 12,000 standard desktop PCs (or 250,000 if you base it on the one I’m using at the moment) and is now officially the UK’s fastest supercomputer. So as well as getting Crysis running at a really good frame rate…

The world's fastest lift!

I grew up in the country. Lifts were rare and therefore very exciting. Even getting to go on an escalator was something of a white-knuckle thrill ride into the possible future, coming around about once a year when going Christmas shopping in a town big enough to have two branches of WH Smith. Once you've felt it, the excitement of effortless upward motion never goes away.

This, the world's fastest lift, is located within the massive Taipei 101 tower. It can take passengers to the 89th floor in 37 seconds, at a speed of nearly 38mph. This is the ultimate in LIFT PORN: