Thursday Top 10: Rubber ducks

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You’re never too old to make bathtime fun, as I told myself while sharing a hot tub with Jimmy Carr, Dawn French, a DVD of old Last Of The Summer Wine episodes, and a whoopee cushion. But an easier way to have a laugh in the bath is to get back to your childhood, and buy a rubber duck. Not just any old rubber duck, of course. A customised quacker that will be as much a source of envy to your friends as your iPod or high-def TV. Probably. With that in mind, here’s ten of the best rubber ducks available.

1. The i-Duck Nano
Predictably quackers (sorry) toy influenced by Apple’s baby iPod – and yes, there is a larger i-Duck available too. Stick a battery inside, and this will glow in the bath for up to 45 hours use before needing a change. If only real iPod Nanos could go for so long… (buy it)

2. The James Brown
Soap up! Soap on up! Scrub on the scene! Etc. Yes, it’s a rubber James Brown duck (pictured above), which claims to be "the hardest working duck in your bath tub. (buy it)

3. The Jumbo Devil Ducky
What’s bright red, extremely squeezy, eight inches long, and floats in your bath? No, not that. It’s this devilish duck, which has its own horns too. And, er, "a moderate-wimpy squeak". That’s not very frightening… (buy it)

4. The McDuck
Tartan duck (pictured right), anyone? Och, it would look good in a loch. I’m actually ashamed of myself for that last sentence, there’s no need to write in. (buy it)

5. The LED Glow-In-The-Ducks
Who needs romantic candlelight when bathing, when you could have a bunch of glowing ducks bobbing up and down? Note, I’m not promising that your other half will be impressed if you junk the candles in favour of these. Anyway, they come in blue, green, pink and yellow as well as the i-Duck model mentioned earlier. (buy them)

6. The Royal Vibrating Massage Duck
Four designs, it’s waterproof, and comes with its own battery. Nuff said. (buy it)


7. The Ducktor Who

Another glowing duck (pictured left), which is clearly this year’s big trend in the rubber duck world (next year: USB compatibility). That said, the only connection with Doctor Who is the duck’s scarf, and the Tardis-like box it comes in – which I’m assuming is big enough on the inside to hold another 17 ducks should you so choose. (buy it)

8. The Slamduck
You don’t have to be adept with a pun to work in the world of rubber ducks, but it clearly helps. The slamduck is a basketball-themed bird, made from vinyl for that all-important b-ball texture. (buy it)

9. The Ninja Devil Duckie
Because ninjas are always cool. Even if they have horns and float in your bath. (buy it)


10. The Dead Ducky

Do goths prefer baths or showers? Until some eager scientists research that burning question, this dead duck (pictured right) is the ideal Christmas present for the sulky kohl-faced teenager in your family. Apparently it does float upright, but is knocked over easily. Realistic, then. (buy it)

Stuart Dredge