Glacier Media Systems promising "3D porn" to revolt you in more ways than previously imaginable

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Now, personally speaking, I’m quite a fan and active user of a wide and varied range of pornography – but I’m not so sure there’s a need to watch it in 3D.

I don’t like the idea of a man’s belly and scrotum protruding into my lounge as he services the needs of a dishevelled-looking East European lady. That crosses a boundary. I want to feel emotionally detached. I don’t want a starring role. I’d never be able to perform under that sort of pressure.

But that’s precisely the sort of in-your-face and in-your-living-room approach to movie-watching being taken by Glacier Media Systems, with its Glacier Iceberg 3D entertainment system promising to bring your existing movie collection into 3D somehow, should you have…

Peripheral company Nyko bravely waves its Wii Wand in the face of Nintendo's legal team

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Is Nyko allowed to do this? Can it really be completely OK for it to make such an inch-perfect clone of Nintendo’s Wii Remote and then sell it to people like it’s its own idea?

Apparently so, as the Nyko Wii Wand was freely displayed above-the-counter at CES 2009, and no police were called to have it seized and taken away. Matching the size, functionality and layout of the standard Wii Remote precisely, Nyko also reckons its offering is better than Nintendo’s, thanks to “Trans-Port technology” – which lets…

Average UK broadband speed is 3.6Mbps – and you're probably only getting half the speed you're paying for

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Ofcom, the communications watchdog that’s in charge of making sure everyone’s phones work and no one’s getting ripped off too badly by the ring tone companies, has revealed the results of a massive survey it conducted into the UK broadband scene.

As you might expect, we’re not getting what we pay for – as anyone who spends most of their evenings conducting broadband speed tests and sighing at the results will already know…

CES 2009: Touch screen gadgets alienate blind tech fans, says schoolground blind icon Stevie Wonder

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It’s all well and good you sitting there, staring at the Palm Pre and imagining yourself navigating its menus after having successfully blagged one for free off your provider, but what about the needs of the blind? You haven’t considered them at all, have you, you selfish little shit?

That’s an issue Stevie Wonder is in Las Vegas to raise, highlighting the fact that the new wave of touch screen gadgets is making many of today’s hot new electric toys impossible for blind users to operate…

CES 2009: Sony reveals its 3" OLED-screened WALKMAN X music and media player

This beauty is the new Sony WALKMAN X range – featuring a 3″ OLED touch screen to make videos look marginally better than they have ever looked before. Although they won’t look very good when you’ve had your fingers all over the screen for six months.

The X1050 and X1060 both feature digital noise cancelling technology, FM tuners, the 3″ 432×240 screen and come with 16 or 32GB of storage space. Here’s a big photo of it, as it’s rather pretty. That’s not my music. That’s someone else’s music.

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The WALKMAN X is even packed with a wi-fi chip and custom BBC iPlayer tool…

CES 2009: Samsung's other four digital cameras – the WB500, ST10, ST50 and ES55

As well as four tasty-looking compacts for the lady-blogger’s handbag, Samsung has also revealed a chunkier wide-angle snapper for the man who wants to look like he’s a proper photographer – plus some extremely odd novelties and a 10megapixel £79 job for kids and grandparents.

Samsung has been busy. Here are four more of its camera department’s new designs in a big list, starting with the…

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…the WB500, which is Samsung’s first go at doing a mega-zoom camera. This model maxes-out at 10x – and features a wide-angle 24mm lens to battle Panasonic’s extremely popular Lumix range. It has a 10megapixel sensor and can also record movies in HD spec.

Samsung UK has given the WB500 a tentative RRP of £229 and says it’ll be out in the UK from January 2009. Which means soon…

New developments in the Tetris world – now it helps reduce mental trauma

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Tetris. Always with the bloody Tetris. We’ve had Tetris ice cubes, Tetris chocolate, another kind of Tetris ice cubes, Tetris watches, Tetris furniture and even Tetris MADE REAL – now it’s time for life-affirming Tetris making people better news.

Basically, some doctors have been using the timeless obsessive/compulsive block-tidying puzzle game to relieve the symptoms of stress sufferers. They found that playing Tetris 30 minutes after being exposed to harrowing imagery…

CES 2009: Pentax announces Optio P70 and Optio E70, possibly the most forgettable cameras in history

The rather non-glamorous Pentax has revealed a couple of thoroughly mid-range new digital cameras – the Optio P70 and Optio E70.

The P70, on the left there in the fetching white finish, is the most impressive model, managing 12megapixels with a 4x optical zoom, a 2.7″ LCD monitor round the back and what Pentax calls its “Pixel Track Shake Reduction technology” image stabilisation tool. It’ll also come in red and silver, if you’re mainstream enough that one of the first things you look for when buying a camera is what colour it comes in.

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Meanwhile, the E70 (right) is a bit more “entry level” – offering “large control buttons,” a 10megapixel sensor and 3X zoom. Both will be out in the US this February…

Japanese space researchers design handy combined toilet/underpant system

Demand a toilet AND underpants in one handy device? The Japan Aerospace Exploration Agency has got it covered!

The clichéd slightly wacky Japanese scientists have built the amazing below gadget, which could eliminate toilet trips for good. Poo and wee are sucked out by a pump, with a built-in washer/dryer system cleaning up the resulting mess, leaving you relaxed, fresh and dry. It’s genius. Especially if the suction pump also comes with optional ‘entertainment’ attachments.

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Might not be the most comfortable thing to wear about the place, but it’ll definitely…

Facebook is… the nation's most popular thing-to-do on Christmas Day

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Astonishing figures from web stat counter Hitwise estimate that one in 22 of all internet data requests was for a Facebook page on Christmas Day, as everyone used their new netbooks to change their status to read “…is stuffed, drunk and nauseous.”

That’s up 69% from the traffic Facebook managed to harvest at Christmas of 2007, giving the popularity-boasting friends/dating portal a 4.65% share of the ENTIRE INTERNET and making it the…