Asus is hiring – boosting laptop manufacturing by 77% to cope with demand

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The globally beloved small laptop maker has said it’s well on target to sell 11.3 million notebooks and netbooks this year and will shift a massive 20 million next year, making it one of the “top four” laptop sellers in the world.

Asus is currently hiring old women and buying hair-nets and raw materials in an attempt to boost its factory output by 77% this year, as it attempts to cope with rocketing demand for its extremely wide – and rapidly widening – range of cheap laptops…

World about to get lighter and stronger thanks to "buckypaper" and the magic of nanotubing

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Buckypaper is similar in concept to papier mache – layer it up thick and it gets stronger. So strong, in fact, that aeroplanes and rockets and even common household chairs could all be made from buckypaper in distant some future world. We are therefore calling it papier mache 2.0.

The invention of scientists at Florida State University’s High-performance Materials Institute (headed by Ben Wang, pictured), buckypaper is a simple way of compositing…

Mobile phones about to become electronic tags – a passport might be required to buy one

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If you’re one of those people who likes to get angry about possible privacy invasions, this should get you nicely red-faced until well after lunchtime.

As part of the vague, all-encompassing crackdown on anything to do with “terrorism,” the government is considering adding mobile phones to its national database of who owns what – so you could be asked to hand over your passport in exchange for buying a cheap pay-as-you-go job…

Make your expensive architect-designed house look RUBBISH with a LEGO radiator

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Sarah Beeny would not be impressed. This could take tens of thousands off the value of your home. The terms & conditions of your mortgage would be voided. You’d be out on the street for Christmas. If you let your children be in charge of your internal design decisions, you get what you deserve.

This is a concept radiator (or at least a concept image of a concept radiator) by Italian firm Sciroccoh, made out of component pieces that resemble LEGO. It’s not particularly clever, as all the illustrator has done here is take an existing thing – in this case a household radiator – then imagine what it would look like if it was made out of LEGO…

Brookstone's voice-activated Handsfree Universal Remote Control

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Continuing today’s impromptu theme of dull things made sexy, we bring you this – a remote control. Made sexy.

The pyramid-shaped remote control has been designed to stand on its end. This ruins the fun game that is trying to stand a remote control on its end on the carpet, but maker Brookstone has additional fun-streams lined up for you – this remote is voice-activated…

Apple's App Store triggers ANGER and RETRIBUTION – iPint and iBeer developers come to legal blows

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The Carling iPint app is apparently little more than a shameless rip-off of Hottrix’s iBeer, according to the man who created iBeer – and is now suing the iPint makers for £7m.

Steve Sheraton, who came up with the original accelerometer-powered beer-drinking illusion app that we have been assured is VERY HILARIOUS after drinking three real beers, claims that representatives of brewing group Coors asked him if they could license his creation for use as an advertising tool. Steve declined, but the major corporation went ahead and created its iPint clone anyway…

eBay Nutcase of the Week: Bigfoot hoaxers sell their fake rubber suit and accompanying chest freezer

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Remember the latest Bigfoot hoax that tricked a few extremely gullible conspiracy theorists on the internet a few months back?

Well, you can now purchase a very special souvenir of the event – the actual rubber suit shown off to the world as a discovered Bigfoot corpse. You also get the original chest freezer the body was shown in, like it’s a big toy in a presentation case…

VIDEO: Energy & Efficiency, episode 4

The kettle. A massive household energy absorber. Mum wants tea. Dad wants tea. You want tea, often all at different times. And sometimes, if you’re busy, you might want a coffee – all require the boiling of a kettle. It is an energy black hole.

So, how can you cut down on kettle use? Is there such a thing as an energy efficient way to generate hot water? Yes! There is! Allow me to demonstrate.

Follow this advice and save pounds…