Top ten things we wish the Conficker worm would do (but it won't)

On April 1st, the infamous Conficker worm will unveil the full extent of its power. The virus, which has squirrelled away inside something like 15 million PCs, will 'activate' by receiving instructions from a mysterious central server.

It could spam, begin DDOS attacks, or just access all your files for identity theft purposes. But those are boring. Let's have a look at what else it could do. Click the picture below to begin.